I’ve been thinking about improving my eating habits lately. It’s not a diet, but actually just changing how I eat. It will also help me lose a few pounds before a trip I’m taking in a month. The best way to do it is through some simple rules. As I was thinking about them, I remembered Michael Pollan’s rules: Eat food. Not so much. Mostly plants. But I also thought about the rules from Gremlins: No bright light. Don’t get him wet. Don’t feed him after midnight. My new eating rules are: Eliminate junk. Less snacking. No eating after dinner.
Looking back at the end of the movie The Last Starfighter you realize that when the video game showed up in that trailer park it was no accident. He was being trained for his upcoming mission. Sometimes I wonder what the universe is preparing me for. There have been so many twists and turns in my life, especially lately after a long, relatively calm period, that I really wonder what is next.
There was an incident at a McDonald’s in Indiana where a woman was unhappy with her McNuggets order from the drive-thru window that she got out of her car and tried to climb into the window. No matter what the problem was it seems like it would have been easier to talk about the problem. Providing she didn’t have to do it over the speaker.
From the next aisle over I heard, You’re looking for Old Lady moisturizer? I glanced down the aisle as I realized he said Olay moisturizer.
Imagine getting to the airport before 4am and seeing a long line at security. To make matters worse, the TSA-Pre line was not yet open so there was no way I could avoid the long line. At least the TSA agent checking IDs was telling bad jokes to the crowd.
A fast food taco place in Minneapolis advertised meat and potatoes burritos on the sign out front. Nothing sounds less Mexican and more Midwestern than the rib-sticking combination of meat and potatoes. Turns out the chain was based in Wyoming and there are locations in many parts of the country. And this burrito is one of their signature items.
Am I the only one who looks up a hotel on Google Maps to determine the orientation of the building when selecting my hotel room?
I don’t have any tattoos. The main reason is that I’ve never really been able to come with anything that I wanted to ink onto my skin forever. Things way more important than that have not lasted forever in my life, so the idea of a cool saying or picture that will still be interesting to me in 20 years is somewhat unfathomable. But what about the game pieces of the action-packed, hilarious board game Operation tattooed in the correct places on my body? I would start with the wishbone, but I don’t really want that inked on my chest.
Airport renovations have to happen while the airport remains open serving passengers. Every time I pass through an airport where they have removed the drop ceiling – exposing the wiring and HVAC system – I’m not sure if I’m traveling through the third world or I’ve ventured into a post apocalyptic future when the airport is deteriorating.
Sometimes on long drives you see signs that just don’t make any sense that they stick with you forever. While driving through the Midwest I saw a sign that listed both the distance to Chicago and St. Louis. As an Easterner, those two cities seem like they are far away from each other and shouldn’t be on the same sign. While traveling in the Republic of Georgia I saw a sign that said Tehran was 1240 kilometers away. A quick conversion determines that it is less than 800 miles away, but the bigger issue is should I really be somewhere that is close enough to Tehran that it is listed on a highway sign?